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Diane LeeWord Wrangler & Law Student
  • About
    • + 62 Micro Memoirs in 2025
    • + 12 Essays in 2024
    • + 26 Essays in 2017
    • + Essays: Mothers & Daughters
    • + Historical Posts
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    • + Never Forget What They Did Podcast
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Love Article

Alone, but not lonely

On 9 June 2012 by Diane Lee

alone but not lonelyI have been single now for four or five years. Oh, I’ve had a couple of “liaisons”, namely Transition Man when I first broke up with the Italian, and Nonsensical Man about a year ago. And there have been a couple of crushes that were nice to have and didn’t amount to anything, as crushes shouldn’t. But there hasn’t been anyone significant in my life, you know, that someone special.

What I’m finding though, is that I am less lonely now than when I was with the Italian. In fact, I’m not lonely at all.

The reason for this is that my life is full of interesting things and interesting people. I run, take photos, tweet, blog, travel, write, go to shows, pubs, cafes, exhibitions, karaoke and the like with friends and acquaintances. I have a daughter who occasionally needs me, and I work, and that requires energy and for me to have my wits about me. I read, watch TV and go to the movies. I have a cat who is always up for a cuddle. I contemplate life and plan my next travel adventure (I’m thinking about cruising Alaska next year). I am meeting new people all the time, who keep adding even more interesting layers to my life.

I have completely rebuilt my life since the Italian, so for me to move over, adjust and make room for a guy, my new mister would have to be quite the special man. He would need to successfully address two specific criteria:

1. How does or can this man add value to my already full and richly rewarding life?

2. Does this man make me want to be a better person, rather than me wish they were?

Unless I am satisfied with how well these criteria are met by any potential* mister, I am staying in the single lane, travelling alone.

But definitely not lonely.

* Married misters need not apply. You fail both my criteria before the get go. However, I am more than happy to have you as my friends, as long as there is no underhandedness, omission or disinformation about your marital status or your intentions. If there is, I will spot it and you will be dead to me.

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Dear Diane

No comments

  • Jamie 11 June 2012 at 6:50 PM - Reply

    Makes sense to me!

  • Susan Cooper 12 June 2012 at 10:04 AM - Reply

    You got that right! It isn’t worth it otherwise.

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